Ding Dong Merrily On High ... I'm Updating My Blog

Happy Holidays!! I'm home for Christmas for the first time in 2 years!! I am discovering with every passing day how much I hate the bloody snow. I hate it. I despise it. And I am apparently determined to wear sandals until my toes fall off from frost bite. So I'm cold a lot. I haven't blogged in over a month - and to be honest, I haven't even noticed. I've been so busy with work and moving into my new place that luxuries like blogging and ... well ... bathing have been far from my mind. (Only half of that is true.)

So, I'm all moved into my new apartment with Muss ('bout time!) and we're loving it so far! It keeps getting more and more "home-y" as we acquire more and more used furniture. Yay! Everything in this house has been passed down by some generous soul who either felt bad for us, or just wanted to clean out their basement. Either way, we totally scored some awesome stuff.

Since returning from Ireland, I still feel like there's not enough hours in the day. I sleep a lot because of my work schedule but I can't seem to rest. I know God is on the move BIG TIME in me, but resting in Him seems near impossible. There's a lot going on in my life that is pushing me towards prayer (a new relationship, work, family etc) so I find myself constantly trying to squeeze in time with the Lord. Even when I do manage, it feels so rushed that I come away feeling guilty and frustrated. I'll have to start planning my time better.

That's about it for now - that's my life. Blessed ... so very blessed ... but so busy. I'll try to update semi-regularly now. But no promises. Hey, if the Lord can't have my time, neither can you!

More than Jolly,
Jen

New Job, New Apartment, New Joy

Right now I'm at work. I'm sitting in the kitchen, waiting for my 3rd batch of cookies to be done. I know - how very "Suzy Homemaker" of me. But don't worry - I'm sure I'll burn something soon. Since returning to Canada, I've noticed my life take a brand new shape. It's fuller - more ... rounded. That's right, my life is now fat.

I've started a new job and I love it. I work at a Private Care Home for Seniors and it' s probably the best job I've ever had. I work 11pm-7am, 5 days a week. Basically while the residents are sleeping, I check on them, back them cookies/cakes/pies etc and watch t.v. (or peruse Facebook when Kiki lets me bring her laptop to work). My boss is this beautiful eccentric woman who truly loves what she does - she makes this fun. She really cares about her staff too - she lets us wash our scrubs at work, have our friends come over to help us bake and she tells us she loves us. Yes, my life is so hard.

I am also moving from Shelley's into an apartment with Muss. I can't believe the day is finally here that Muss and I will actually be living together. It's exciting for a thousand different reasons but really - we just can't believe we're actually going to do it. We've paid a deposit so there's no turning back now. There's just so much to do!

I'm working a lot right now - 17 hours a day to be exact. So when I'm not working, I am sleeping blissfully in Shelley's basement and trying to squeeze in time with my girls. It's hard not seeing them whenever I want, but I can't help but remind myself - "It will be worth it on payday!"

So that's it for right now, I am just learning to be mature with money, trying to re-establish myself in my church and my family and ... well ... learning to strive for more.

Is this what growing up feels like? ... Huh ....

More than Pondering ,
Jen

Things I Love

In keeping with my last post, I've decided to make another list. This time, Things I Love - trust me, I AM going somewhere with this.

I Love ...

1) When I hug the dog and can still smell my Mom's perfume on the top of her head - I love knowing she gets loved so much that she permanently smells like Mom.

2) When Tina gets "the after dinner giggles" and pinches my face and goes a little crazy.

3) Waking up at 2am cause Muss has texted me with some ridiculous detail about her day.

4) Looking in the mirror right before I finish getting ready for a girls night out - my Mom always comes up behind me and tells me how beautiful I am.

5) MY NEW STRAIGHT HAIR!!

I know it's a short update but we're heading out to get fish and chips (pizza for me!) and I don't have enough time for a long one. I'm sure my ever-growing readership will be more than understanding.

More than Hungry,
Jen

13 Things That Are New

Okay I am only giving myself 13 minutes to complete this post (including sign-in/sign-out time) cause I need to clean this house before Tina gets here! Woo! Thanks for coming to visit Tina -

Mom's working and I'm cleaning. Awesome.

** Since I last posted ... **

1) I have developed a love for Carrie Underwood that I thought I would be ashamed to admit to - but I am delighted to report that I'm not. She's great - and very talented, if not a little twangy.

2) I have developed a terrible case of Sciatica. Ouch.

3) I won money at the dog races and solidified my desire to get into addictions counselling.

4) I have hated army wives, despised army wives and had my faith restored in army wives in the space of a week. (Full explanation to come, when I'm not being timed)

5) I bought my first Ireland souvenir that's just for me and no one else.

6) I discovered that I am arriving back into Regina (via Calgary/Med Hat) on the exact day we left for Ireland 2 years ago - October 13th. Eeerie.

7) I am running out of time.

8) I've helped my Mom set up TWO MP3 players in the space of 2 days and she's returned both. Cause she wants an iPod.

9) I told her to get an iPod in the first place and she didn't listen. Argh.

10) I've laughed harder than I have in a long time with the girls.

11) I rolled down a hill - it's been years and the dog definitely didn't appreciate this little detour in our daily walk.

12) I learned "Amazing Grace" on guitar

13) I found out that my stepdad hung out with Ewan McGregor in Iraq yesterday. (A little extra info - totally didn't remember how hot Ewan is until I saw this picture)

That's it, whew! Almost didn't make it! Now, a few pictures and we're done.

More than 13 Minutes Later,

Jen

Reunited

I found my cousins on Facebook. The ones I love the most and miss terribly - I found them! This is more exciting than you guys will know - I haven't spoken to them in ages and I haven't really made much of an effort to re-enter their lives. You know how sometimes you stay away for fear that you love them more than they love you? I should have known better - they love me too. And I bet if I asked them, they'd say they always have.

Man, I've missed my brothers.

More than Overjoyed,
Jen

Look Alive People! Look Alive!!!

Okay okay, sorry about the "slit-my-wrists-depressing" last post. And thanks to my amazing friends who are so encouraging and incredibly hot. Here's something a little less Debbie-Downer (10 points and a Coke Slurpee if you get the reference). I am now totally hooked on Grey's Anatomy. Seriously, I get excited, I cry, I laugh, I get angry (though not as angry as Tasha, who seems to lose her mind at least 12 times during every episode!) and I love it. I was determined not to give in but once I saw one episode, I was just done. AND, whenever it's on here, it's a double-bill so we get 2 episodes. Man, this is the life.

We also got a new couch yesterday (pics to come)!! Apparently the old one was the source of my new bed-bug bites, so our landlord ponied up a new one. Yeah, it's a futon. Whatever though, can't complain much cause it's brand new and free. So woo hoo!

I discovered some old pictures from last year on Kiki's digi-cam so they're up on my Facebook. AND, check out this cute picture from when Tasha's friend (and now MY friend) Marcelle came to visit! Isn't she a doll?! ISN'T MY HAIR JUST STUPID LONG?!

Another little piece of news is the 2 other girls in my department gave notice on Friday. Yeah, they're done at the end of the month, leaving me with 15 guys. I am now the ONLY source of estrogen in my whole department (and if you know anything about my hormone imbalance, that's not saying much!). It will be interesting to say the least ...

That's all I got for now, so I am going to pepper this post with some pictures and then head home for Shealagh's home made Bandera bread!!!

More than Stoked for BP's like food,
Jen

I Haven't Been Myself Lately...

So, things are crazy and it's hard not to get discouraged. Work has been uncomfortable since the week I started - I won't go into detail because it's unnecessary, but I've had some trouble with a couple of the guys on my team. I feel like I can't rest with the situation hanging over me like a giant reminder of my past. I haven't done anything I regret ... but I hate that I considered it. I'm not as strong as I think I am ... and it's good that I learned this now before returning to Canada thinking I've got it all together.

Waiting for "him" is hard ... especially when I thought I had found him ... it's stupid and I hate being one of those girls who blogs about her "nowhere to be seen future husband" but I need to write it out of my system. So, here it is. I feel him ... I can sense him - not in a physical way but in my soul. I ache for him - not just to find him but to pray for his protection, for his heart - I ache to pray him out of the situations I know he's facing. And I can't see him anywhere. I'm not even looking anymore because I know I'll just know it when we meet - but I'm discouraged by being surrounded by jack-ass guys all day who turn guy-girl relationships into something so perverse that it makes me sick. I'm starting to lose hope. Not that he's out there and not that I'll find him - I'm losing hope that he'll be what I want him to be when I actually find him.

What if he's just a huge disappointment ? What if he's just like the others ... ?

More than Overanalyzing This Situation,
Jen

Sorry for the lack of Postage

I've been mental busy with work and the girls and living an extremely non-busy life - so I haven't posted much. And I'm lazy. Really lazy. So here's some pics of recent events - maybe if I post enough pictures you won't notice the serious lack of content on my blog. Maybe.

Okay .. nevermind - the PC I'm on won't let me post pictures today ... so we'll have to do it another day. Sorry everyone - cause I know you were really excited and all.

More than hoping this works next time,
Jen

New Job, Less Rain, Hot Internet Shop and Girls I Miss

Honestly, are they AGAINST opening the door in this place?! There's one tiny little fan circulating the stifling air in this whole net shop. Bah. Anyways, it's not nearly as rainy today - it's muggy and very still - and the sky is dark. Tutt, tutt looks like rain. Of course.

I went for my job interview at The Bank yesterday - it was brutal. The position is the manager of the whole IT department. I've never worked in IT. I know nothing about IT. I am the most under qualified person for this job. And yet they still hired me - for far more than I'm worth. I swear - they must have been desperate. But somehow all my customer service experience = 10 years experience in management and IT. I just don't get it. I mean, thank the Lord for my job - absolutely - but by the time they train me, I'm gonna be leaving the country. Of course, they don't know that. By the sounds of things they think I'm a lifer. Anyways, yeah - I got a new job and it's great. I just have no idea what I'm doing and I start Monday.

Whew. At least the whole interview thing is over. The whole process took an hour and a half (because he was so impressed, he called his colleague to come meet me and I had to explain my experience all over again...) and by the time it was over we were talking about dress code and cell phone usage. Nice. In the end, it's great - I got the first job I interviewed for. No more interviews for me. But I do have to wear a suit every day. 2,000 thumbs DOWN for that. I look like Tommy Callaghan in a suit. (10 points to anyone who gets the reference).

I'm signing out now cause Shealagh is looking bored. Will update later this weekend if I can think of anything gripping to say.

More than Sarcastic Today,
Jen

Here Comes The Sun ... Doo doo doo doo ...

First of all - SORRY! I know it's been like 2 weeks since I updated but being in Regina kept me extremely busy. And Facebook. Facebook is ruining my life - I swear. Okay so .... the wedding was epic, as were both convocations! The girls were stunning at all 3 events and we had so much fun. Tina and I fought like crazy (cause that's what we do) and I spent a good 2 weeks driving Shelley and her busted ankle around! It was awesome though - we got to bond over perms and shopping and so many lunch dates that I am worried my pants won't fit anymore. My Dad was so good to all us girls at the wedding - aside from when he made me polka with him for 7.5 minutes. The dress, the shoes and the hair all came together nicely - although I think I've exceeded my "girly quotient" for the rest of the year. I will wait until my wedding day to get that dressed up again.

Aside from those 3 big events, I spent a lot of time with friends. I did coffee with my favourite Steve (buy his c.d. from me or I'll never hear the end of it), coffee with Belinda and Vonda (my favourite church ladies) and dinner with Denno, Ghia, Tina/Muss/Kris/Shay, and a bunch of other people you guys don't care about. So, I am interviewing for 2 jobs this week - one is a management position and the other one ... I have no idea. I just said I'd go. Either way, I'm broke and need to find work soon. Prayers would be appreciated.

As for now, Shealagh is here and we are doing our best to get her accustomed to life in Dublin. Of course it's raining like crazy today - just in time for a shining first impression. My flights were long and boring but safe - just how I like 'em. And I met a cute boy in the Toronto airport - but more about that later.

I'm tired and jet lagged so that's it for today - keep an eye out for future posts with stories I will try to conjure up at some point.

More than Lagged,
Jen

The Surprise!

So I'm here in Regina, SK and everything is going really well! The surprise for Tina went off without a hitch - we both bawled and even after countless slip-ups over the 7 months preceding the surprise, she had NO IDEA I was going to be in Canada. So AMEN! Woo hoo! The flights were actually really good - for some reason the flight from Dubs to Toronto was only 5.5 hours long - so I was delighted about that! I cried when I saw a Pontiac Sunfire on the way to my hotel in TO - it's strange what sparks emotion hey?!

So right now Muss and Kris are in Edmonton at the Police concert and Tina and I are going to spend our weekend shopping for wedding accessories and maybe hitting up Mosaic. It's been so lovely to spend time with just her - I can't believe how much I've missed her. I can't believe how much this place means to me. God has really blessed me with the ability to even go on this trip and I am determined to squeeze every little moment out of it.

Hope you are all well - for those of you in Ireland - I miss you but not so much the country and for those of you everywhere else - I just miss you. Will upload some pictures from the airport and the surprise soon.

More than Happy to be Here,
Jen

The Trip So Far ...

Mom and Kiki dancing to "It's Raining Men" before we left for the pub. My Mom is probably the cutest person alive.

Tasha, Mom and Kiki (and Mya trying to jump in) posing for a lovely photo shortly before leaving.

Kiki and I. I'm starting to think that every picture taken of us ends up looking exactly the same - we've just changed outfits.

Kiki and Tasha. I guess we took a whole ton of pictures before leaving the house. None of them are really all that interesting but hey, that's the deal with photo journals.

This has to be the last one cause the camera died as I was uploading the photos. There are more where we've actually left the house and gotten to the pub - I promise, there was dancing and darts. There was even daylight. I'll try to upload them tomorrow. Anyways, that's all for now!

More than Exhausted from Uploading,
Jen

Tanning, Laughing and 1 Very Lucky Little Girl

So far our trip has been fabulous! We've laughed so much that my stomach hurts today and we did some tanning (I fell asleep in the sun cause I like 3rd degree sunburns) so I am a lovely shade of raw chicken. Yesterday we went to the market and bought a whole ton of fresh fruit and vegetables (later to be eaten with chips, vanilla ice cream and Pepsi) and Tasha and my Mom went on huge bender shopping sprees. It was lovely to see them both so delighted with all of their new clothes. Tonight we are going to "The Grapevine". It's a pub in these here parts and it's legenday - apparently this is the place to go if you want to feel good about yourself due to the large amount of trashy and unstable people that gather there. Nice huh? I'll just remove my "Christian Missionary" badge and put it over here with my back issues of Humanity Today...

There is one story I am putting off telling for I fear it paints me in a bad light. Please keep in mind it was very hot, I was very tired and she was REALLY asking for it. When we finally arrived at our gate (after the cross country trek from one side of the airport to the other) we noticed it. The yelling. The screaming and crying. HER. I glanced around to find who/what was making this tremendous fuss and I saw this little girl with shock blonde hair, tear stained eyes and her mouth open mid scream. She was about 4 years old and she was in my bad books immediately. As we were lining up to board the plane, she got louder and louder - she wasn't just crying beause she was upset, she was scream-whining "Mooooooom!!!!!! NO!!!!!!" over and over again. And her Mom simply stood there ignoring her and occasionally throwing a "Ssshh!" over her shoulder while she talked to her friend.

My skin was crawling and the blood was rushing to my face - I was so angry and so determined that the offending child would be sitting nowhere near me. I watched in horror as the other passengers cleared a space around them so no one had to be near that child. When they finally got on the plane, we had a blissful 2 minutes of silence before we too had to board. Of course, when I got on, I met eyes with the one other person in the world as livid as I was at that moment and she said (very loudly and while looking directly at the offending toddler) "I'm trying to get away from THEM, but they've just moved closer to me!!" I just said "Yeah ... I know ... " (I mean, what else can you say right?)

Please let me explain why I was so enraged in point form:

1) We were raised to not throw tantrums. If we EVER behaved like that in public, we'd only do it once.

2) I don't think ignoring your child when she's throwing a tantrum in a public place is the way to go about it. Discipline her for crying out loud - scold her! Do something but don't just stand there while your kid screams herself hoarse infront of 100 middle aged and easily annoyed passengers. I'm not a parent, so I don't know the whole story but this was one of those situations where you know the Mom just doesn't care/want to deal with it and the kid is just being a brat because she's used to getting her own way.

3) I wanted to say something but couldn't. That made me the most mad. It wasn't my place (as everyone else was already leaning over to comment on the child) but I so wish it was. My Uncle Geoff is terribly funny and mild mannered but he told me a story once where he was in line to pay for some groceries at Safeway when the child infront of him threw an epic tantrum. The mother stood there and did nothing to stop her kid from freaking out in a line of people and so my Uncle leaned over to her and said "Listen, are you going to discipline him or should I?" She immediately dealt with the situation and all was fine.

This little girl enraged me. I've never felt so much anger towards a child in my life. And her mother ... well, let's just say - actually, let's just not say. It's safer that way. In any case, my iPod served me well on the flight so I couldn't hear her screaming and crying like Linda Blair mid exorcism. Needless to say I glared at her mother when we met eyes at the arrivals gate and she stared back, defiant and proceeded to tie her daughter to the stroller with one of those kid leashes. Strollers have wheels lady, and you didn't lock them first. Classy parenting guys - learn it here.

More than Judging Something I Know Nothing About,
Jen

Quick Quick Quick!

Okay I am sick of being in this internet shop with the screaming baby, complaining Polish girl and that "smell" that's so strong you can practically SEE it, so this update will be speedy. We head out tomorrow morning so I should really be at home packing right now. Alas, I am a Crimmins so I am leaving it until the very last minute. Today (the wonderous last day of work) was tremendous! I actually got tons done and didn't leave my lovely boss with any mounds of paperwork to deal with.

I really don't have anything of substance to say so ... oooh! Here's something productive! If you're checking out my blog you've obviously got some spare time on your hands so ... go check out http://www.stephenjameslarsen.com or look him up on Youtube and watch his kick ass videos. Go show some support for our local talent guys. You heard it here first.

Also if you're putzing around (and have already taken my advice by leaving Steve an encouraging note on his Myspace or, (Lord help you), his Facebook) you can read about what's going on in Darfur. Show some support for ending the genocide folks! Visit www.savedarfur.org and sign a petition, donate some funds or even buy a shirt at www.cafepress.com that somehow helps by advertising the need ON YOUR PERSON. Love it.

Anyways, I'm done now. So take good care and look out for a post about my Mom and the adventures we will be having with her.

More than Using World Events and Steve Larsen as Filler,
Jen

TGFTTT

3 things I am thankful for this week:

1) We are heading off to England for 4 days starting on Thursday and to quote my Mom - the weather is supposed to be "absolutely gorgeous". The weather report shows an average of over 20 degrees for every day we're there. I am so so thankful for nice weather in which I will tan and drink cold beverages with the ladies.

2) Tomorrow is my last day at this job – my contract term is up so I will be looking for a new job when I get back from England. I am so glad it's over. Yes, it was mindless and quiet and so lovely but I couldn't take it much longer.

3) Steve Larsen. I am thankful for him for many reasons but mostly because even looking at a picture of him makes me laugh. Not that he's funny looking but when I was looking at a picture of him today (stalker alert!) I remembered some of the good times we've had together and I burst out laughing in the crowded internet shop. I like memories like that.

That's all for now. I will try to update once again before we leave for England but if I don't – Cheerio! And I'll blog when I get there. I may even post some awesome pictures of the girls and my Mom. She's hot. If you know her, you love her and if you don't know her – YOU WANT TO.
More than Stoked to Be Done Work,
Jen

Things I've learned from and about my Mother

1) Standing up straight and wearing a good bra really WILL make you look thinner.

2) If you can't make a decent cup of tea AND a decent rye and coke, you are expendable on a Friday night in Medicine Hat. (Luckily for you, my Mom is willing to teach you how to do both. But she won't tolerate any faffing about and she will only show you ONCE).

3) You can flirt your way out of pretty much any situation (putting Tips 1 and maybe 2 to use will aid in this endeavour).

4) Don't assume – it makes an ass out of you and the customer.

5) Any problem, and I mean ANY problem will seem significantly smaller after a trip to the Bin. Especially when you almost get arrested for defending your Mom's "right to party" by throwing a drink in the bartenders face.

6) Nothing completes a trip to Wal-Mart like Mom freaking out at McDonald's luke-warm fries and her refusal to buy her own drink.

7) I'm "too pretty for tattoos".

8) Christina and I are forbidden from marrying men who aren't exceptionally good looking. "I don't want ugly grandchildren" is filtered into every conversation about marriage and babies.

9) "Is everybody having a good time?! I want to see lots of happy smiling faces!" when said through Mom's gritted teeth will coax even the most reluctant individual into "full-on terrified party mode".

10) No one makes my Mom laugh like me. NO ONE.

More than Hoping I Turn Out Just Like Her,
Jen

What I'm Listening To Today:

**Updated -This is probably the most accurate description of my relationship with Christ I've ever read. Download it if you can or watch it by clicking right HERE!

Aaron Shust - My Saviour, My God

I am not skilled to understand
What God has willed, what God has planned
I only know at His right hand
Stands one who is my Savior

I take Him at his word and deed
Christ died to save me this I read
And in my heart I find a need
For Him to be my savior

That He would leave his place on high
And come for sinful man to die
You count it strange, so once did I
Before I knew my Savior

My Savior loves, my Savior lives
My Savior's always there for me
My God He was, my God he is
My God He's always gonna be

Yes, living, dying; let me bring
My strength, my solace from this spring
That He who lives to be my king
Once died to be my Savior

Weird Things Went On Today

This first one isn't weird - I took a lovely black and white picture of my Fender. I just think it's pretty.

Fender and I shared our first kiss this morning. It was very romantic and everything I hoped it would be.

Okay ... this might be a stupid question but I am absolutely serious when I ask it ... ready ??

Is this water polo??? I have no idea what these guys are doing (I also didn't know I still had the camera in black and white mode) but there was a ball, some nets, tiny kayaks and a lot of yelling.

If that is indeed water polo - I watched it for a good 10 minutes before realizing that yes, they were actually TRYING to get to the ball. I thought it was just one of those "do this and look stupid and we'll all stand around and watch you things" - maybe for a charity or concert tickets ... but when I heard them screaming at eachother and saw all the other "teams" waiting in the background ...

I'm confused. Is this a sport?

More than Un-Sporty,
Jen

My Brand New Fender Acoustic Guitar

It's beautiful. It's lovely. It's quite possibly the most beautiful guitar to ever grace this earth. And it's brand spankin' new. In fact, it's a new model that Fender just released. I love it. It's made my day. Here's some lovely pictures of it:

Isn't is tremendously fabulous?! I had to take this less than awesome picture on a dirty Dublin sidewalk just so you fair readers could get the first glimpse.

A little closer up but couldn't get the full shot as we were on a dirty Dublin TRAIN hurtling through the city.


And of course, this is me DELIGHTED with my new guitar. I have waited many many years for the perfect Fender guitar to strum it's way into my life and here it is ... my day has been epic.

More than Smitten,
Jen

A Dress, A Mom and 4 Days of Excruciating Pain (May 17th)

Tina finally got the dress I sent her! Let the heavens open up to display the angels rejoicing and a single golden tear rolling down Christ's face. It's about time! I was so scared she wouldn't get it in time for my Dad's wedding in June - which I realize is still weeks away but still! She has it, it's lovely and she's going to look beautiful. As usual.

So I'd like to extend a welcoming hand and introduce you all (Muss, Tina, Shay and sometimes Sandra) to my Mom! She has entered the blogosphere and actually READS MY BLOG. So make her feel welcome - leave her a comment or two at the end of this post. Ah my readership - so loyal, so funny, so scarce these days ... I was kicking myself last night when I talked to her on the phone and realised that she's going to go back and read the archives of this blog (as any proud Mom would) and she's going to notice 3 things:

a) Her daughter is LAME.

2) Her daughter consistently struggles with double negatives and too many exclamation marks.

iii) Her daughter doesn't talk about her Mom nearly enough. Except for the time she crashed her Mom's car after joyriding in it without permission. And even then she blogged about it and acted like it was funny when her Mom still isn't able to laugh about it.

It's been nice knowing you all ...

**Stuff you really don't NEED to know warning** So, it's "that time" for me and any of you who know me (and hopefully that's all of you that are reading this ... it weirds me out that people I don't know may read this and start to feel like they know me - which is fine! I love lurkers ... but I especially love lurkers who make themselves known and don't figure out where I live from the info on this blog and come and cut me to pieces in the middle of the night) you understand that "this time" is very special and almost sacred (as I vowed that if I ever experience "this time" and "this pain" again, I wouldn't complain because God is blessing me with increased chances of having babies some day). However, "this time" is extremely painful. Blindingly so. Yesterday a couple of guys from IT were talking to me about nerdy computer stuff and I got such terrible cramps that I WENT DEAF. Seriously. I couldn't hear. I had to ask them to repeat everything which means I had to sit through their nerdy lecture all over again! I don't think they understood that the 2nd time they explained NT versus some other kind of something, I was crying out of BOREDOM not pain. Anyways, it's been 4 days and the pain hasn't lessened. I swear if I hadn't made that vow to the Lord, I would scream at the top of my lungs until I went hoarse and passed out. Anything but grinning and bearing it.

That's all I've got for now - but I am going to get something super cool this weekend so stay tuned for pictures. And no Mom, it's not another "bloody tattoo the size of your bloody head".

More than Cramped,
Jen

For My Sister

I hope this picture tribute will make you smile - I tried to show you what a day without you is like for me. Funny, strange, rambly and always a bit sad. So here's some random events to make you smile and some inevitable truths to remind you - I love you.

Haha, I hate that man - he thinks he's above God. Literally. So I squished him. A few times.

Reminds me of Mom and her love for Angels. Wish you were here to take goofy tourist pics with me.

Making crazy faces to make you laugh at Eddie Rockets. Some day we will dine together once again.

Typical "Jenny Posing". Check out those chubby cheeks and dimples. Rewind 21 years and I looked exactly the same. Just less body hair.

Rushing through Dublin on the bus. Everything passes so quickly aside from the time. I miss you so much I ache inside.

Another Dublin statue. Gorgeous, celtic and stone. Love it. I looked like an idiot standing under this statue in the middle of a busy street trying to take this picture. I suffered for you Tina G!

The river - cold and dirty. So much of this place seems to fit that description. The spirit of the city is cold and unwelcoming at the best of times. I miss laughing with you.

Things are starting to become green and lush again. No matter how green it gets though, part of me longs for the hilarious drive through Saskatchewan to Alberta with you. The scenary can't be beat in the summer. And yes, "I wanna shoop baby".

All those spaces and I still feel there's no place for me in this city sometimes. So full and so lonely.

Thinking of you while sitting on the bus. There's nothing comforting about that view. Cranes crowd the skyline while clouds push down them. It seems like it will rain forever sometimes.

Remember when this area was all black from bonfires?? Art has replaced derelict Spencer Dock - it's almost too abstract to appreciate at times.

A man was shot a killed right outside those doors. I feel so callous when I casually walk in to get groceries or bin tags. I know they can't close the shop in respect for the life taken but sometimes I wish they would so I wouldn't feel so guilty.

Count 'em Tina. 6 on each foot - as always. Wrinkled baby feet - isn't that what you called them? "Wrinkled baby feet on a six toed freak".

My hairy nose. Thought you might appreciate this close up - as unflattering as it is to me.

My dimples - oh how you love them. I couldn't take a picture of the "other dimple" and post it cause that sort of picture belongs on a different site all together.

Our dark East Wall street. It was cold today and I wanted to sit and watch movies with you.

Abercorn Road - would love to have you here to poke fun at all the strange goings-on around here. Even the SIGN is run down and dirty!

The building I look at about 12 times a day - we'd love to buy it and fix it up for the kids but we lack the money and drive. So for now it's just wasted potential. Like so many things around here.

The sky today - it was dark all day and I can't remember the sun making it's debut even once. I hate days like this - they remind me of Canadian Novembers. They remind me of hot chocolate and pajama's and period piece movies. Of Wal-Mart afternoons and sub-titled films that you'd force me to watch. Days like this remind of all the wonderful things we do together and they serve as a cruel reminder of the distance between us. I can't be there right now - despite desire and at times desperation - but please know I love you over the time, miles and phone calls that seperate us - it's only temporary. Temporary, unlike my love for you that is unyielding, unending and at times like these, indescribably and almost painfully strong.

I miss you and I love you.
Jenny/Kiddo/Loser/JJ/Baby J/Me

xoxox

Some Pictures

We went out for supper with Kat and Karen last night - thye were only here with us for 3 days but it was lovely to have them. We got to go to the beach, go shopping and just hang out and have a great time with them.

Kat got that shirt on a pub crawl - that's right, it's a picture of David Hasslehoff and it says "I Heart Berlin" on the front.

Kiki and I at Eddie Rockets last night - after this the girls went to see some Irish Dancing and Live Music and I escaped back home to talk to Muss until the wee hours.

I love this picture and I don't know why ... she's one of my favourite kids and this was such a cute day - it was taken on Kiki's birthday when the neighbourhood kids drew her a huge card on the road with sidewalk chalk.

A better, clearer picture of my new tattoo - (I know it's big Mom). It's healing nicely due to the excessive amount of lotion I douse it with daily.

Because you haven't seen enough visual testimonies of the hovel that is our flat - this little tree somehow made it's way out of the cracks in the linoleum and grew to that height before we chopped it down. We were going to let it grow until we remembered that Kat and Karen were coming and they probably wouldn't find it as funny as we did.

When Andrea was here, Kiki tried to give her dread locks and when that didn't work, she ended up with braided extensions. Kiki is wearing the extra blonde hair and blowing a kiss to complete the "look".

I can't remember for the life of me what made Tasha laugh THIS HARD when wearing that fake hair but I love this picture. So much joy in our house at times.

And this is the picture I promised the lovely Sandra - we were talking on the phone and I somehow managed to drop a mirror on my EYE. If you look very closely under my eye, you will see a very small bump - this small bump actually turned into a full fledged black eye after 2 days. I rock.

More than Tired of this Internet Shop,
Jen